Voice of the killer (Transcript)

STRANGE TOWN SERIES:

VOICE OF THE KILLER

HEy y'all,

Welcome to the new issue of my zine of strange occurrences. I'm sorry that it’s been a while, please forgive me. I had to finish my exams.

I've also been busy at work due to the events I shall relate.

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I've been working in a call center of the famous insurance company, Life Contracts. Things here have been extremely chaotic.. or should I say, agile and flexible?! That's right - your correspondent has become a working girl, learning all kinds of exciting corporate lingo.

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(Bus sign)

The bus is gone. I'm tempted to bail but won't get paid until I can make it through probation, and I promise I'd have colored pictures next issue. I am committed...

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(Seashore)

The company building is next to the Sea which would be nice if it didn't smell like piss. Night and day the waves make an awful sound, like a vast mouth breathing. This is said to be the result of "geology", the baleful science.

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FW: FW: FW: FW: Urgent;

Dear BB,

I can't see you - are you still real?

Were you ever real…?

It's 3am: I'm alone in the office.

But soon the day will start.

And I will see you again, soon.

Your call Target for today is [100].

If you cannot hit it I will need to have you escorted from my life.

Sincerely, Line Manager

Liney

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Officially my job is to cold call people from a list of potential customers. But some days nobody ever gets me the list. Where is the list? Who manufactures the list? I've been trying to figure it out so I won't get fired.

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Inside it's always busy and panicked feeling and nobody wants to talk to me, a sign of a vibrant company culture. Everything smells like carpet. Behind the closed doors I hear footsteps and chatter.

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I guess everyone wears these sheets in the office as a confidentiality requirement. Mine hasn't arrived yet, although when I gave HR my address they promised they would "visit me soon".

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In the breakroom a shroud turns to face me; from beneath the sheet I dimly sense lips moving, chattering against the fabric. I can't hear any words. I'm still not very good at work banter so I just smile and nod as I tried to find a coffee machine.

[Muffled cloth sounds]

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(1000s of corpses found)

Same news as always. The sound is off, and the radio is playing Wham!.

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(Coffee machine)

Two inches of strangely viscous coffee ooze out of the machine. I think I'm getting a taste for it.

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[BBs desk]

Five leads - far below the call target my supervisor requested. The day’s work of managing expectations begins!

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(Call 1)

BB:

Beep! Hello, this is BB, representative for the prestigious Life Contracts organization. Have you considered your coverage of late?

Caller:

WHAT!? Who gave you this number!! Never call me again!!

[click]

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(Call 2)

BB:

Beep! Greetings! This is Life Contracts. We have a fabulous offer for you, an offer from the stars. Would you perchance enjoy hearing more…?

Caller:

No! NO! AIEEEEEEE! AIEEEEEEEEEEE!!

[click]

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(Call 3)

BB:

Beep! Hell-

[The voice on the other and start speaking immediately and intently in a low voice. You are unable to make out any of the words. Aware that you are being monitored for time, you gingerly hang up after four minutes.]

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(Call 4)

BB:

Beep! DEAD! DEAD! You're DEAD! You're going to DIE! it will happen to YOU! So, um, why not talk to Life Contracts? Boy, who wrote these scripts?

Caller:

[Low rattling choke]

[click]

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(Call 5)

BB:

Beep! Edward, I can't make love to you - I'm a priestess of Baal! Well, I hope this one isn't picked for call listening.

Caller:

Where are you people calling from? Wasn't this line deactivated years ago? O-oh god!!

[click]

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BB: Every day these leads get worse! Well, time for a coffee break.

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Policemen roam the back corridors. I wear an intent expression and sip coffee to remain inconspicuous while I'm wandering around. Their motionless faces continue staring out to sea.

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The noise of the waves mixes with the background murmur of the call center. I see some things that could be seals move around the waves.

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I try the door to the dialer room but it won't open. Am I supposed to be able to get in here? Didn't they say I'd get the key in the mail?

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The boxes of complaints seem to absorb the sound around me.

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Back here are older wallpapered passages from when the building used to belong to someone else. It feels like it's been forgotten about, but someone is still watering the plants I guess. The door locks behind me.

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(Lost boardroom)

(Note)

Proud to announce that we have succeeded in winning the call handling contract for all of the activities, to last until Q3

Existing staff must be gradually familiarised with the new process in order not to cause alarm

Police will be on staff for all instances and have agreed to use our iceroom for this purpose

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I can't tell how recent these are. The attached charts are all indecipherable and look like they came from archaic 3D modeling software.

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Actions

- more hand sanitizer

- access to the Bay

- route will commence 4am-6am

- watch out for

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(Key card)

I guess I can hold on to this until my real one arrives. There's a crude marker drawing of the key on the surface but I can't see any name.

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On my way back I open one of the file cabinets - rubber bands, Staples, documents about nothing I'm familiar with. There's still no-one around.

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I try a key card on a door but it won't unlock. Nobody's around to help, but at the other end of the hallway I think I hear a murmur.

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When I step inside the lights are dimmed and the murmuring grows louder, more excited. I feel they're talking about me and trying to walk through faster.

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Cool policeman:

Are you sorry for the things you've done?

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When I escaped from the back I found myself in a crowded suboffice somewhere in the depths of the building. It's filled with policemen using it as a temporary lounge. Nobody is paying much attention to me - I guess it's a 'catch-and-release' for now!

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Cool policeman:

You can trust me, I'm a cool policeman. Check out these yo-yo tricks. Did you ever hear of the band name fugazi?? You look like someone I want strangled in a dream. Does something smell like blood in here or is it just me?? Ha ha ha. Ignore that - I'm quirky but I get the job done.

BB:

Someone behind the desk is enjoying his new voice while pretending to talk to me. I carefully deflect queries. Rule #1 of making a zine is to never talk to the police.

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Police guy:

Wow, I can't believe this Cool Policeman - he has the top clearance rate in the whole city, Since none of the bodies were ever found. Do you think I could get an autograph?

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Now I don't recognize where I am at all. Is this another department of the call center? Other employees are walking slowly, through a doorway at the end of the hall.

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I go through another door - this one's filled with managers. Shredded paper fragments covered the floor and everything smells of disinfectant and warm rubber.

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Wait, are these the call lists I was looking for? I look through and see the numbers of dead people, missing people, family, strangers, friends - numbers, home addresses. This might not be my department.

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Cultists 1 and 2:

– Boy, the rate is so high these days.

– They're saying the rate is going to go up even further.

– We'll certainly need the extra space for all of them.

– I'm glad we figured out how to make money from the rate!

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Cultists 3 and 4:

– Did you hear? He's coming to visit later on.

– I hear he's very picky about what he sees.

– will do our best to make everything just right for him.

– I'm so excited that we finally get to meet him.

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The second dialer is next to the ocean again - outside is darker than before. The low chatter of voices sounds like the sea. Suddenly I feel relaxed, as though I'm where I need to be.

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I find the desk that's not mine but that waits for me. The call scripts are written out phonetically: after a while I stopped trying to work out what they really mean, and lose myself in a rhythm of my own voice.

Say i s o c k me reset e may I

Say - aye - ess - oh - see - kay - me - res - ett - ee - may - eye

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That night I had a dream that felt like waking from the dream.

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Clumps of hair were growing out of the sand. I tried pulling them up and found only more hair. My coworkers were calling me from further down the beach.

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In the distance a large tongue moved forward from the ocean and it waved at us. We looked and waved back. Some people I knew were swimming out there to meet it.

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Bodies moved across the shoreline and slipped into the water. They were slowly drawn farther out to sea as though following some magnetic pull. There was a good howling.

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In a room above the waves the management are getting ready to eat. There's a place for me. The food looks so enticing that I want to cry.

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The meat of the tongue is almost too pliant to cut through but my knife is very sharp. I carved out the square and put it into my mouth.

It's delicious - tripping with wet fat and juice. I chew and chew but it never seems to diminish in my mouth.

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And when I woke up, my pillow is gone.

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My lips are chapped and sore. It's 3am.

I checked my phone - I have a new message. Apparently the office burnt down last night and will be closed indefinitely. They don't know whether anybody was inside.

As I had not completed my basic training, I would not be eligible for severance pay.

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[End of report]